| Marriage does not change a man much. Before the wedding, he loves all the women on earth, After the wedding, it is just one less! |
| My wife told me that I'm very sensitive and overreacting. I categorically denied that and stormed out of the house crying! |
| Micro Insult: Husband: Do you like a handsome husband or an intelligent one? Wife: Neither. I like you! |
| Marriage counselor: What's the problem? Man: My wife needs help. Every night, she's roaming from one bar to another. She has to stop it. Marriage counselor: Is she an alcoholic? Man: No, she's looking for me! |
| Wife: I had a worrying dream that someone kidnapped me. Me: What's so worrying about it? PS: It seems I'll be sleeping on the sofa permanently! |
| Hi Guys, I'm here to say goodbye. My wife says I'm addicted to social media and that it's ruining our relationship. We argued for a while and she told me to choose between her & social media. So, I'll be logging off now while I pack her bags & call her a taxi. I'll be right back! |
| I was planning to buy a GPS for my car, but then I remembered that I have this magical ring on my finger that connects me to the woman sitting on the passenger seat who knows everything. So I dropped the plan! |
| Whenever my wife's friends see me, they always ask my wife... . . . . . `How did this happen?` |
| For a long and happy married life, you need: 1)Trust 2) Good communication 3) Intimacy 4) Alcohol |
| Exchange of text messages: Husband: You are negative Wife: And you are stubborn, arrogant, a low life, care about no one but yourself and your friends, all you are interested in is your own self, all your life not fulfilled even one of your promises. It is only I who is putting up with such a miser and insensitive man. You good for nothing, fat, ugly man. Even your hair transplant failed. Husband: I was just informing you that your Covid test is negative. Wife: Oh... sorry! |
