| One day, Santa, Banta and their friend walked into a bar together. They proceeded to buy a drink. Just as they where about to enjoy their drink, three flies landed in each of their drinks. Their friend pushed his beer away from him in disgust. Banta fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing had happened. Santa picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the drink and then started yelling. "Spit it out, Spit it out, You Bastard, Spit it out!" |
Dead Friend Banta and his friend are out in the country shooting rabbits. Suddenly, Banta`s friend falls right in front of him, throws a quick spasm, then lies perfectly still. He doesn`t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. In fact, he looks pretty well dead!
Good deed! An air force officer goes to heaven and at the gate St Peter asks him if he has ever done anything in his life that he believes makes him worthy of admittance to heaven. The officer replies...