| A man drove past a traffic camera and saw it flash. He couldn't believe he had been caught speeding when he was driving below the speed limit for once! He turned around and drove past again, this time even slower. But as he passed the camera, it flashed again. He was angry! He turned around again and this time drove past at a snail's pace. But again, the camera flashed. "Oh, well," he thought. "It must be broken." and drove home. A week later, he received three tickets in the mail for not wearing his seatbelt! |
| Becky was the manager of a jewelry store that catered to the rich of the rich in Boca Raton. She was seeking a qualified person to fill the recently vacant position of salesperson. Sarah, an outspoken older woman, comes in to interview for the position. Becky looks at Sarah's resume and notices that Sarah has never worked in jewelry before. "If you don't mind my saying so, for someone who has never worked in jewelry you certainly are asking a pretty high salary. That's chutzpah, wouldn't you say?!?" asks Becky. Sarah thinks for a moment. "Well, I suppose I am," replies Sarah, "but you must understand, the work is so much harder when you don't know what you are doing." |
| Morris had died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Morris' Last Will and Testament. "To my dear wife Esther, I leave the house, 150 acres of land, and 1 million dollars. To my son Barry, I leave my Big Lexus and the new Jaguar. To my daughter Shirley, I leave my yacht and $250,000. And to my brother-in-law Aaron, who always insisted that health is better than wealth, I leave my treadmill." |
| These two couples play golf together regularly at their club, and on the sixth hole, a par four, the second shot to the green must carry 80 yards over water. One of the women, Mrs. Smith, for over a year, could never carry the water, and would always hit into it, totally psyched out by the presence of the water. Her friend in the group suggested that she might want to see a hypnotherapist to overcome her anxiety near the water. So the woman went to a hypnotherapist for four sessions. In those sessions, the woman was hypnotized and the therapist would "plant suggestions" that when playing the second shot on the sixth hole, she would not see water, but rather a plush green fairway leading all the way up to the green. About six months later, a woman at the club asked whatever happened to Mrs. Smith, that she hadn't seen her playing golf at the club for almost four months now. She was informed that five months earlier, Mrs. Smith had 'Drowned' at the first leg of the sixth hole!! |