| A woman, cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note, saying, "I've had enough and have left you...don't bother coming after me." Then she hid under the bed to see his reaction. After a short while the husband comes home and she could hear him in the kitchen before he comes into the bedroom. She could see him walk towards the dresser and pick up the note. After a few minutes he wrote something on it before picking up the phone and calling someone... "She's finally gone... yeah I know, about bloody time. I'm coming to see you, yeah... Right Now.. put on that sexy french nightie. I love you... can't wait to see you..." He hung up, grabbed his keys and left. She heard the car drive off as she came out from under the bed. Seething with rage and with tears in her eyes she grabbed the note to see what he wrote... The note read, "I can see your feet under the bed. We're outta beer. Be back in five minutes. Love You!" |
| Ek Baar Main Apni Sunder Si Padosan Ke Saath Ek Park Mein Gaya. Hum Ekant Main Baith Gaye Aur Yahan-Vahan Ki Baatein Karne Lage. Thodi Der Ke Baad Vo Boli Ki Ab Kya Karein? Maine Kaha Ki Ek Joke Sunata Hun. Usne Kaha Ki Theek Hai Sunao. Maine Joke Sunana Start Kiya: Ek Baar Ek Sanyaasi Raat Mein Mandir Ke Bahar Bageeche Mein So Raha Tha. Tabhi Vahan Ek Sundar Si Ladki Aayi Aur Us Sanyasi Ke Saath Lait Gayi. Subah Hone Par Sanyasi Bahut Pachtaya Aur Jaakar Apne Guruji Se Pucha: Batayiye Guruji, Prayashchit Kaise Hoga? Guruji Ne Pucha: Tumne Us Kanya Ke Saath Kuch Kiya Tha? Sanyasi Bola: Nahin Guruji, Kuch Bhi Nahin. Guruji Bole: Das Din Tak Subah Uthkar Ghaas Charo. Sanyasi Ne Pucha: Aisa Kyun Guruji? Guruji Bole: Kyunki Tum Awwal Darje Ke Gadhe Ho. Ye Joke Sunte Hi Meri Padosan Sharmate Hue Jasne Lagi. Phir Kaafi Der Tak Hum Wahan Baithe Rahe Aur Aise Hi Baatein Karte Rahe. Phir Hum Dono Uthkar Jaane Lage. Jaate-Jaate Usne Mujhe Rs 100 Diye. Maine Pucha: Ye Kisliye De Rahi Ho? Padosan Haste Hue: Thodi Ghaas Kharid Lena. |
| During a robbery in America, the bank robber shouted to everyone in the bank: "Don't move. The money belongs to the State. Your life belongs to you." Everyone in the bank laid down quietly. This is called "Mind Changing Concept` Changing the conventional way of thinking. When a lady lay on the table provocatively, the robber shouted at her: "Please be civilized! This is a robbery and not a rape!" This is called "Being Professional" Focus only on what you are trained to do! When the bank robbers returned home, the younger robber (MBA-trained) told the older robber (who has only completed Year 6 in primary school): "Big brother, let's count how much we got." The older robber rebutted and said: "You are very stupid. There is so much money it will take us a long time to count. Tonight, the TV news will tell us how much we robbed from the bank!" This is called "Experience." Nowadays, experience is more important than paper qualifications! After the robbers had left, the bank manager told the bank supervisor to call the police quickly. But the supervisor said to him: "Wait! Let us take out $10 million from the bank for ourselves and add it to the $70 million that we have previously embezzled from the bank." This is called "Swim with the tide." Converting an unfavorable situation to your advantage! The supervisor says: "It will be good if there is a robbery every month." This is called "Killing Boredom." Personal Happiness is more important than your job. The next day, the TV news reported that $100 million was taken from the bank. The robbers counted and counted and counted, but they could only count $20 million. The robbers were very angry and complained: "We risked our lives and only took $20 million. The bank manager took $80 million with a snap of his fingers. It looks like it is better to be educated than to be a thief!" This is called "Knowledge is worth as much as gold!" The bank manager was smiling and happy because his losses in the share market are now covered by this robbery. This is called "Seizing the opportunity." Daring to take risks! So who are the real robbers here?? |
| A young boy enters the barber shop and Bill Soprovitch the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you." The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves. "What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!" Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. "Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?" The boy licked his cone and replied, "Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!!!!" |