| In a Nursery School Canteen, there was a basket of Apples with a notice written over it: Do not take more than one, God is watching. On the other counter there was a box of chocolates. A small child went & wrote on it: Take as many as u want, God is busy watching the Apples. Moral: NEVER ACT SMART WITH today's generation...!!! KID: Why some of your hairs are white, Dad? DAD: Every time you make me unhappy, one of my hairs turns white... KID: Now I understand why Grandpa's all hairs are white... Moral: Don't be over smart with today's kids! Child: Mummy why Gandhiji had no hair on his head? Mummy: Because he spoke truth only. Child: Now I understood why ladies have long hairs... The moral remains the same! |
| Ever notice how a 4-year-old's voice is louder than 200 adults ? Several years ago, I returned home from a trip just when a storm hit, with crashing thunder and severe lightning. As I came into my bedroom about 2 a.m., I found my two children in bed with my wife, Karey, apparently scared by the loud storm. I resigned myself to sleep in the guest bedroom that night. The next day, I talked to the children and explained that it was OK to sleep with Mom when the storm was bad, but when I was expected home, please don't sleep with Mom that night. They said OK. After my next trip several weeks later, Karey and the children picked me up in the terminal at the appointed time. Since the plane was late, everyone had come into the terminal to wait for my plane's arrival, along with hundreds of other folks waiting for their arriving passengers. As I entered the waiting area, my son saw me, and came running shouting, "Hi, Dad! I've got some good news!" As I waved back, I said loudly, "What's the good news?" Alex shouted, "Nobody slept with Mommy while you were away this time!" The airport became very quiet, as everyone in the waiting area looked at Alex, then turned to me, and then searched the rest of the area to see if they could figure out exactly who his Mom was. |
| The teacher asked her class what each wanted to become when they grew up. A chorus of responses came from all over the room. "A football player." "A doctor." "An astronaut." "The president." "A fireman." "A teacher." "A race car driver." Everyone that is, except Little Johnny. The teacher noticed he was sitting there quiet and still. So she said to him, "Johnny, what do you want to be when you grow up?" "Possible" Little Johnny replied. "Possible?" asked the teacher. "Yes," Little Johnny said. "My mom is always telling me I'm impossible. So when I get to be big, I want to be possible." |
| The little boy was sitting on a park bench munching on one chocolate bar after another. After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you know eating all those chocolates isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, make you fat." The boy replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old." The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 chocolate bars at a time?" The little boy answered, "No, he minded his own damn business!" |