Waitress: How did you find your steak, Sir?
I just looked next to the potatoes and there it was!
I made a graph showing all my past relationships.
It has an ex-axis and a why-axis!
Just In:
The Russian vaccine will be sold in India as Putinjali!
My wife and kids are threatening to walk out of the house because of my addiction to horse racing.
And they're off!
I tried to carry my oversized board game onto the plane, but I wasn't allowed.
They said the risk was too big!
I wish I were a woman. I would know everything then!
I always get nostalgic putting my car in reverse.
It really takes me back!
"What's the Wi-Fi password?"
~ How people say hello these days!
I bought my daughter a locket with her picture inside, for her 18th birthday.
Just so glad she's now finally 'independent'!
It just occurred to me that the opposite of Artificial Intelligence is...
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Real Stupid!