3 women on sex.
1. My man is like a Rolls Royce, smooth and sophisticated.
2. Mine a like a Ferrari, fast & powerful.
3. Mine is like an old Fiat, needs a hand start!
7 nude men were standing in a row. Seeing them, a guy asked - Are you all advertising for a 'condom'?
They replied in unison - No, it's for 7 Up!
What can a cow do that a woman can't?
Stand in water up to it's tits without getting the ass wet!
Johnny: Dad, where did I come from to this life?
Father: You were brought by a stork.
Johnny: That's strange, you have such a pretty wife, but nevertheless you're screwing a stork!
A dick to another: Let's go watch a sexy movie.
The other replies: Are you crazy? Who's gonna stand for 3 hours?
1st Dick: We can have a Viagra!
A girl calls a boy: Ghar Pe Koi Nai Hai. Aa Jaao, Aish Karenge!
Boy (shocked): Abhi To Tere Saath 2 Baar Kar Ke Lauta Hu?
Girl: Oh, Sorry! Phir Se Tumhe Hi Lag Gaya!
Relationship Tip:
If she's giving you Blowjob while in the shower...
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have courtesy and shampoo and condition her hair while she does it!
Mary: My last boyfriend said he fantasized about fucking two girls at once.
Peter: Yeah, most men do. What did you tell him?
Mary: I said, "If you can't satisfy one woman, why would you want to piss off two?"
On the internet they found romance,
That put both in a sexual trance,
But each had a gripe,
That it's hard to type,
With a hand stuck down in your pants.
How do you make your girlfriend scream while having sex?
Call her and tell her!
