The police just pulled me over and said, "Papers?" I said, "Scissors, I win!" and drove off. I think he wants a rematch - he's been chasing me for 45 minutes! |
Some days I get a feeling that my wife married me only because she needed someone to carry all these shopping bags! |
My wife says I only have 2 faults. I don't listen and something else! |
It's been months since I bought the book, "How to scam people online." It still hasn't arrived yet! |
I met my wife on Tinder. That was awkward. Her profile says, "Single"! |
Guys, once you're married, your right to like or comment on other women's pictures on social media ceases. Offenders will have to face serious repercussions! |
Difference between school and life: School teaches you lessons, and then gives you a test. Life gives you a test, and you learn the lessons! |
If you hate your job, the solution is simple. Get married. You'll not only love your job but also look forward to spending more time there! |
Dad: You scored only 40/100 on the Maths test. Kid: I scored 20 on the last test. So, that's 100% growth. Sharma Uncle's son scored 85 last time and 95 now. That's only 11.8% growth. You should be proud. Dad: Yes, I am proud of you. One day you'll be India's Finance Minister! |
Jeeto: I think our neighbour died! Santa: Who, Ray? Jeeto: I don't think cheering is appropriate! |