| I mustache you a question, but I'm shaving it for later. |
| My uncle owned a kebab shop, but he's dead now. He was buried with all his equipment. He'll be turning in his grave... |
| I'm a light eater. As soon as it's light, I start eating. |
| In olden times sacrifices were made at the altar - a practice which is still continued. |
| Whoever said "laughter is the best medicine" never had gonorrhea. |
| I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back. |
| The Wedding March always reminds me of the music played when soldiers go into battle. |
| I wonder why you can always read a doctor's bill and you can never read his prescription. |
| Life is hard. After all, it kills you. |
| Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem. |