| I`ve learnt so much from my mistakes, I`m thinking of making a few more! |
| Signage in a hospital waiting room: Smoking helps you lose weight ... One lung at a time! |
| Sign in a Bar: Those of you who are drinking to forget, please do pay in advance. |
| Routine of holidays: Sleep till u r hungry; Eat till u r sleepy. |
| Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever. |
| I think the freezer deserves a light as well. |
| I asked her for some space, she got me an external hard drive. |
| I wish Google Maps had an 'Avoid Ghetto' routing option. |
| I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired. |
| I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die. |