Half of 2015 has flown by, and it's worth taking stock of Bollywood. So, I did some good-natured hacking to get into the cell phones of the newsmakers so far, to know their current status updates. Believe it at your own risk, after all it's hacking:

Deepika Padukone:After Piku you can formally address me as the New Queen.

Kangana Ranaut:150 crore dahlings. Queen is sooo last year. Call me Empress.

Salman Khan:For my fans, there are no bylaws only Bhai laws.

Shah Rukh Khan:The competition is now at home in the form of AbRam.

Anushka Sharma:From PK to VK.

Ranbir Kapoor:Allergic to all things Velvet.

Zoya Akhtar:Rich, beautiful people also have problems, okay!

Anurag Kashyap:Media made me a star when I was a nobody but when stars started thinking I am somebody media treated me like everybody.

Priyanka Chopra:First they mock your accent then you troll them by top lining an American TV show. I'm Hollywood baby.

Varun Dhawan:I can make a Badlapur work as well as ABCD 2. That's right, you can call me the New Ranbir.

Aamir Khan:They loved me as an alien but not so much as a dog. Feel like an alien on Pluto.

Karan Johar:I can act. I can host. I can dance. Now I have to remind people that I'm actually a director.

Amitabh Bachchan:Take your pick: Anand's Bhaskar Banerjee or Piku's Bhaskor Banerjee.

Ranveer Singh:Battery Never Low.

Akshay Kumar:Nobody mentions my hits Baby and Gabbar Is Back, all they want to know is when is my wife writing a film for me next.

Anil Kapoor:I always feel I'm on top of the world!!

Emraan Hashmi:These days everyone is a serial kisser. No wonder I lost my mojo.

Shahid Kapoor:Currently Listening To: Mira bhajans.

Sonam Kapoor:My Ellie Saab feathery gown at Cannes was couture with a 'c'. You all just don't get fashion. You know what I mean!

R Madhavan:Tanu Weds Manu Returns starring R. Madhavan.

Dibakar Banerjee:The real mystery of Detective Byomkesh Bakshy! is if there will be a Part 2.

Irrfan:These Bollywood heroes are still talking 100 and 200 crore clubs while my last film made $ 1 billion dollars.

Radhika Apte:Rishi Kapoor wanted to know my name, I was sooo good in Badlapur.

Shoojit Sircar:;Sperm done. Shit done. Next is what?