Sperm Count Test

  •  

    An 85-year-old man was requested by his Doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical exam.

    The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.'

    The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previous day.

    The doctor asked what happened and the man explained, 'Well, doc, it's like this--first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing.

    'Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, still nothing.

    'She even called up Nancy, the gal next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she even tried squeezin' it between her knees, but still nothing.' The doctor was shocked!

    'You asked your neighbor?'

    The old man replied, 'Yep, none of us could get the jar open.'
  • Virgin Honeymooner A guy who is a virgin gets married.
    On the honeymoon the guy walks into his hotel room and his wife is naked on the bed. She asks the man, "Do you know what I want...
  • Sex With a Patient A doctor had just finished a marathon sex session with one of his patients.
    He was resting afterwards and was feeling a bit guilty because he thought it was...
  • The Shipwrecked Man A man was shipwrecked on a remote island. Although he had plenty of food and water, there was nothing for him to do except play with himself.
    After many years, even that became so monotonous that...
  • Viagra for Grandpa A man goes to visit his 85-year-old grandpa in the hospital.
    "How are you grandpa?" he asks.
    "Feeling fine," says the old man...
  • The Naked Customer One dismal rainy night, a taxi driver spotted an arm waving from the shadows of an alley halfway down the block. Even before he rolled to a complete stop at the curb, a figure leaped into the cab and slammed the door...
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT