•  

    A couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and inform the other if there was sex after death. Their biggest fear was that there was no after-life at all. After a long life together, the husband was the first to die. True to his word, he made the first contact:

    "Judy.......... Judy...."

    "Is that you, George?"

    "Yes, I've come back like we agreed."

    "That's wonderful!? What's it like?"

    "... Well, I get up in the morning, I have sex. I have breakfast and then it's off to the golf course. I have sex again, bathe in the warm sun and then have sex a couple of more times. Then I have lunch (you'd be proud - lots of greens). Another romp around the golf course, then pretty much have sex the rest of the afternoon. After supper, it's back to golf course again. Then it's more sex until late at night. I catch some much-needed sleep and then the next day it starts all over again"

    "Oh, George, are you in Heaven?"

    "No, I'm a rabbit in Kansas."
  • Well Hung French Guy Three men, an American, a German, and a Frenchman, completely drunk, after a late night dinner, are having a conversation.
    The American: In my country we have buildings that...
  • In the Circumstances Two five year old boys are standing at the toilet to pee. One says, "Your thing doesn't have any skin on it!"
    "I've been circumcised...
  • Johnny's Bitch!!! The teacher asks the kids in class: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
    "How about you, Johnny?"
    "I Wanna be a billionaire, go to the most expensive...
  • What Men Mean Haven't I seen you before? = Nice ass.
    I'm a Romantic = I'm poor.
    I need you = My hand is tired.
    I am different from all the other guys...
  • Sexual Advisor An elderly lady asked a General what he did. She was told that the general was in charge of a division and was responsible for defence of his part of the land....
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT