Watch your ass !

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    Three desperately ill men met with their doctor one day to discuss their options. One was an alcoholic, one was a chain smoker, and one was a gay.
    The doctor, addressing all three of them, said, "If any of you indulge in your vices one more time, you will surely die."
    The men left the doctor`s office, each convinced that he would never again indulge himself in his vice. While walking toward the subway for their return trip to the suburbs, they passed a bar. The alcoholic, hearing the loud music and seeing the lights, could not stop himself. His buddies accompanied him into the bar, where he had a shot of whiskey. No sooner had he replaced the shot glass on the bar, he fell off his stool, stone cold dead.
    His companions, somewhat shaken, left the bar, realizing how seriously they must take the doctor`s words. As they walked along, they came upon a cigarette butt lying on the ground, still burning.
    The gay looked at the chain smoker and said, "If you bend over to pick that up, we`re both dead."
  • Hell or Heaven ! After some walk, Saint Peter`s keys accidentally fell on the ground. Unaware, he bent over to pick up the keys. That was something the gay man just couldn`t resist, so he jumped on him and did his...
  • Red Indian An attractive woman was driving through a remote part of Texas when her car broke down. An Indian on horseback came along and offered her a ride. She climbed up behind him on the horse and they rode off. The ride was uneventful except that every few minutes the Indian would let...
  • Banta s infedility ? Suspecting her husband Banta of infidelity, Mrs Banta attempted to put an end to it by arousing his jealousy. 'What would you say if I told you that I`ve been sleeping with your...
  • Scaring kids... Santa gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and...
  • Teasing the Gorilla! It`s a beautiful warm day and a man and his wife are at the zoo. She`s wearing a cute loose-fitting, pink spring dress, sleeveless with straps. As they walk through the ape exhibit and pass in front of a very large gorilla, the beast goes crazy. He jumps up on the...
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