Before it Starts!

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    A man came home from work, sat down in his favourite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, "Quick! Bring me a beer before it starts!"

    She looked a little puzzled, but brought him a beer.

    When he finished it, he said, "Quick! Bring me another beer! It's gonna start!"

    This time she looked a little angry, but brought him a beer.

    When it was gone, he said, "Quickly! Another beer! It's gonna start any second!"

    "That's it!" She blows her top. "You bastard! You waltz in here, flop your fat ass down, don't even say hello to me and then expect me to run around like your slave! Don't you realise that I cook and clean and wash and iron all day long?"

    The husband sighed. "Oh shit. It's started."
  • Security Check! When I was ready to check out and pay for my groceries the cashier instructed, "Strip down, facing me." Making a mental note so I could...
  • After 25 years of Marriage Married 25 years, I took a look at my wife one day and said, "Honey, 25 years ago, we had a cheap apartment...
  • How to Make a Man/Woman Happy! How to make a man happy:
    1. Feed him.
    2. Leave him with peace.
    3. Don`t check his phone...
  • Shopping in London Paddy & Jimmy were walking along a street in London. Jock looked in one of the shop windows and saw a sign that caught his eye. The sign read, "Suits...
  • Students Classification by Age Classic examples for students of different age groups:
    1st to 3rd class: Hey! I studied everything for exam.
    4th to 6th class...
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