| With the introduction of Viagra in response a perennial male problem, a famous British pharmaceutical company is now working on a range of new drugs in an attempt to redress the balance. MIRRORCILLIN A 5cc dose enables a woman to walk past mirrors for up to four hours without pausing once. STOPPANAGGIN Gives women a vague feeling of contentment towards their spouse or boyfriend. COSMOPOLIRA Raises female intelligence to levels allowing `facts` in trash lifestyle magazines to be disputed. LOGICON Trials have showed that females taking this were able to follow a proposition through to its logical conclusion, and argue effectively without being diverted into non relevant postulates such as 'you don't love me anymore.' PARKATRON 72% of women taking this were able to safely reverse park a Ford Fiesta into a space only 12 meters long; 54% achieved this in under 15 minutes. MAGNATACK Uniquely distorts the cornea, making certain shapes appear much larger than in reality - no practical use for this drug has yet been found. WARDROBIA Clinical trials show that almost 23% of women taking this drug can safely walk past a sale notice, and an amazing 42% actually stayed within their credit limit. BEERINTULIN Engenders a female desire to bring her spouse/boyfriend alcoholic beverages and snacks during televised sports. |