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    A woman brought a very limp duck in to Dr. Santa, a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the duck's chest.

    After a moment or two, Santa shook his head sadly and said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."

    The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"

    "Yes, I am sure. The duck is dead," replied Dr. Santa.

    "How can you be so sure?" she protested.

    "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."

    Dr. Santa rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at Santa with sad eyes and shook his head. Santa patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room.

    A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.

    Santa looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."

    Dr. Santa turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill.

    "1500 Rs!" she cried, "1500 just to tell me my duck is dead!"

    Santa shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been Rs 250, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now 1500."
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