Firm. Juicy & Fuzzy Peaches

  •  

    Texas Rancher was selling his peaches door to door. He knocked on a door and a shapely 40 something lady dressed in a very sheer negligee answered the door.

    He raised his basket to show her the peaches and asked, "Would you like to buy some peaches?"

    She pulled the top of the negligee to one side and asked, "Are they as firm as this?"

    He nodded his head and said, "Yes ma'am," and a little tear ran from his eye.

    Then she pulled the other side of her negligee off asking, "Are they nice and pink like this?"

    The farmer said, "Yes," and another tear came from the other eye.

    Then the lady unbuttoned the bottom of her negligee and asked, "Are they as fuzzy as this?"

    He again said, "Yes," and broke down crying.

    The lady asked, "Why on earth are you crying?"

    Drying his eyes he replied, "The drought got my corn, the flood got my soy beans, a tornado leveled my barn and now I'm gonna get screwed out of my peaches."
  • Flirtatious & Naughty Nurse A doctor just finishes his check-up with a man. and said: I`ve got good new and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?
    Patient: I guess the bad news.
    Doctor: Well, you only have about 3 months to live and...
  • Mind Your Language! This is a memo to Indian staff. This one is extremely funny. And what makes it funnier is the fact that it is a REAL memo from a prominent company. Every word here is quite intact and no word has been altered...
  • I Wanna Suck! One day, Little Johnny`s teacher, Miss Figpot asked the class if they could name some things you can Suck or Lick!"
    "Ice cream, ma`am!" Little Mary answered.
    "Good, Jane." Miss Figpot said...
  • 365 Days of Sex! To My Dear Wife, During the past year I have tried to make love to you 365 times. I have succeeded 36 times,which is an average of once every ten days. The following is a list of why I did not succeed more often...
  • Scare Me Little Johnny and Little Mary were walking home from school one day. As they walked along, they saw two dogs knotted up along side the road, doing it, well, doggy style...
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT