Santa Banta Jokes

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    Santa Apni Marriage Anniversary Wale Din Apne Ghar Ke Bahar Udaas Sa Baitha Tha, Banta Ne Ye Dekha Aur Uske Paas Aakar Puchha.
    Banta: Oye Bahar Kyu Baitha Hai?
    Santa: Yaar Aaj Marriage Anniversary Thi To Mene Wife Ko Gift Mein Chain Di Aur Usne Mujhe Ghar Se Bahar Nikal Diya.
    Banta: Kyu? Chain Chandi Ki Laya Tha Kya?
    Santa: Nahi, Cycle Ki.

    Santa And Banta Jungle Mein Ghumne Gaye, Saamne Se Ek Sher Aa Gaya.
    Banta Ne Sher Ki Aakhon Main Mitti Phenki, Aur Santa Ko Chilla Kar Bola: Oye Baag Jaldi Se.
    Santa: Main Kyun Bhaagu, Mitti To Tune Phenki Hai.

    Bant Bhagwan Ki Tapasyaa Karna Shuru Kari. Kafi Time Ke Baad Bhagwan Ji Uski Tapasya Se Khush Hokar Prakat Hue Aur Bole.
    Bhagwan: Var Maango Vats.
    Aadmi Sharmate Hue Bola: Prabhu, Aap Jaisa Soch Rahe Ho Main Vesa Nahi Hu, Mujhe To Vadhu Chahiye.

    Teacher To Student: Beta, Answer Sheet Par Sabse Pehale Kya Likhna Chahiye?
    Student: Iss Sheet Par Likhe Gaye Answer Kalpanik Hai, Jinka Kisi Bhi Book Se Koi Sambhandh Nahi Hai.

    Pappu Ek Bar Apni Girlfriend Ko Milne Gaya To Uski Girlfriend Ne Kuch Sungh Kar Kaha.
    Girlfriend: Aapne Muli Ke Paranthe Khaye Hai?
    Pappu: Nahi Nahi, Main To Sandwich Kha Ke Aya Hun.
    Girlfriend: Dont Try To Lie, I Know Lips Can Lie But Hips Dont Lie.

    Santa Ne Ek Bar Bazar Mein Amrood Khareeda Aur Khane Laga. Achanak Usne Dekha Ki Amarood Bich Mein Ek Keeda Hai.
    Santa Gusse Se: Abe Oye, Tere Amrood Mein Se Toh Kida Nikla Hai.
    Amrood Wale Ne Kuch Socha Aur Phir Bola: Bhai, Apni Apni Kismat Hai, Kya Pata Agle Amrood Mein Se Motorcycle Nikal Aaye.
    Santa Ne Ye Suna Aur Khush Hoke Bola: Achcha, Chal Fir 5 Killo Pack Kar De.

    Circus Ka Malik Santa Ko Dante Hue Bola.
    Malik: Be Parwai Ki Bhi Koi Hadd Hoti Hai Tune Raat Ko Sher Ko Khula Chod Diya Thha?
    Santa Hairan Hote Hue: Iss Se Kya Farq Padta Hai Sher Ko Koun Chori Karega.
  • Late Night Party A teenage girl had just been given family-car privileges, when she returned home very late from a party. The next morning her father went out to the driveway to get the newspaper and came back into the house frowning...
  • Wives Are Always Right Harry was stunned to come home from work one evening and find his wife stuffing all her belongings into a suitcase. "What on earth are you doing?" he cried.
    "I can`t stand it anymore...
  • Shopping With The Wife After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Sainsbury`s.Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out. Equally unfortunate...
  • A Hunting Accident Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. His eyes are rolled back in his head and he doesn`t seem to be breathing. The other hunter takes out his cell phone and calls...
  • A 65 year Old Mom With all the new technology regarding fertility recently, a 65-year-old woman was able to give birth. When she was discharged from the hospital and went home, her relatives came to visit...
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