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    Melvin comes to confession. "Father," he said, forgive me for I have sinned."

    The priest asked, "What did you do, my son?"

    "I lusted," Melvin replied.

    "Tell me about it," the priest said.

    Melvin then related his story,. "Father, I'm a deliveryman for UPS. Yesterday I was making a delivery in the affluent section of the city. When I rang the bell, the door opened and there stood the most beautiful woman I have ever seen. She had long blonde hair and eyes like emeralds. She was dressed in a sheer dressing gown that showed her perfect figure. And, she asked seductively if I would like to come in."

    "And, what did you do, my son?" asked the priest.

    "Father, I did not go in the house but I lusted. Oh, how I lusted," replied the man.

    "Your sin has been forgiven," replied the priest. "You will get your reward in heaven, my son."

    "A reward, father? What do you think my reward might be?" Melvin asked.

    The priest replied, "I think a bale of hay would be appropriate..., you dumb ass."
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