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    Bad Bernie was in prison for seven years. The day he got out, his wife and son were there to pick him up. He came through the gates and got into the car.

    The only thing he said was, "F.F."

    His wife turned to him and answered, "E.F."

    Out on the highway, he said, "F.F."

    She responded simply, "E.F."

    He repeated, "F.F."

    She again replied, "E.F."

    "Mom! Dad!" their son yelled. "What's going on?"

    Bad Bernie answered, "Your mother wants to eat first!"
  • Sex With Goat A door to door salesman is making his rounds through the neighborhood and knocks on the next house on his list. A little boy answers the door and the salesman says, "Hi, is your mother in...
  • Unlock the Door Little Johnny and Jill were about to go into his apartment and before he could open his door, Jill said, "Wait a minute, I can tell how a man makes love by how he unlocks his door...
  • Open Your Legs There was a couple going at it for the first time, and after a while, the guy asks the woman to open her legs a little wider. She does and they continue. A few minutes go by and he tells her again, "Open your legs...
  • Grandmother's Advice My grandmother died in the 50s, but her birthday is coming up, and that always causes me to reminisce. The long walks we used to take to the store in town, the quarters she gave me for meaningless jobs like pulling...
  • Cheating Husband A businessman and his secretary, overcome by passion, go to his house for an early afternoon "quickie."
    "Don`t worry," he purrs. "My wife is out of town on a business trip, so there`s no risk...
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