The Benefits Of Older Women

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    An older woman will never wake you up in the middle of the night and ask you, "What are you thinking?" An older woman doesn`t care what you think.
    An older woman always carries a condom in her purse. A younger woman is still hoping the guy might have one on him.
    An older woman is a cheaper date. A younger woman will cost you 12 beers, but an older woman will sleep with you after a cup of a herbal tea.
    The older a woman gets, the stronger her libido gets and the older a man gets, the weaker his libido gets... which is why nature intended young guys to go out with older women and young women to go out with older men
  • Too far in ! ยท Santa, with his girl friend is out carousing one evening. While driving down the highway Santa says to the girl, 'If I go 100 miles an hour, will you take off your clothes?'
  • Daddy longlegs! A little girl was playing in the garden when she spotted two spiders mating.
    Daddy, what are those two spiders doing? she asked .<
  • Annual Physical check up An old man goes to the doctor for his yearly physical, his wife tagging along. When the doctor enters the examination room, he tells the old man, 'I need a urine sample, a stool sample and a sperm sample.'
  • Chicken Farmer! A woman walks into her accountant`s office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes.
    The accountant says, 'Before we begin, I`ll need to ask a few questions.'
    He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, 'What is your occupation?'
  • Firmed up! One morning while making breakfast, Santa walked up to his wife and pinched her on her butt and said, 'You know if you firmed this up we could get rid of your girdle.'
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