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    Paul returned from a doctor`s visit one day and told his wife Alma that the doctor said he only had 24 hours to live.
    Wiping away her tears, he asked her to make love with him. Of course she agreed and they made passionate love.
    Six hours later, Paul went to her again, and said, "Honey, now I only have 18 hours left to live, Maybe we could make love again?" Alma agrees and again they make love.
    Later, Paul is getting into bed when he realized he now had only eight hours of life left. He touched Alma`s shoulder and said, "Honey? Please?"
    Just one more time before I die." She agreed, than afterward they rolled over and fell asleep. Paul, however, heard the clock ticking in his head, and he tossed and turned until he was down to only four more hours.
    He tapped his wife on the shoulder to wake her up. "Honey, I only have four hours left! Could we...?"
    His wife sat up abruptly, turned to him and said, "Listen Paul, I have to get up in the morning! You don`t."
  • A strong old man? Two old drunks in a bar. The first one says, 'Ya know, when I was 30 and got a hard-on, I couldn`t bend it with either of my hands. By the time I was 40, I could bend it about 10 degrees if I tried really hard. 'By the time I was 50, I could bend it about 20...
  • The cop fooled? Santa is standing, pissing into a fountain in the middle of town. A cop comes up to him and says 'Stop that and put it away!'
    Poor Santa shoves his dick into his pants and does...
  • Unbeatable logic! A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried this creative defense:

    'My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few trifling articles. His arm is not himself, and I fail to see how you can punish...
  • Bad experienece! A police officer pulls over an elderly female for speeding while driving her husband to a doctors appointment. The officer approaches the vehicle and attempts to explain that he stopped her for speeding.
    She looks at her husband and asks, 'What did he...
  • Strange fondness ! An Army Colonel was reviewing the troops. One man he passed sported an enormous erection.
    'Sergeant!' the Colonel shouted. 'Give this man 30 days compassionate home leave.'
    'Yes, sir,' the Sergeant...
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