Wife has the last say..

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    A husband and his wife who have been married 20 years were doing some yard work. The man was working hard cleaning the BBQ grill while his wife was bending over, weeding flowers from the flower bed. So the man says to his wife, "Your rear end is almost as wide as this grill" She ignores the remark.
    A little later, the husband takes his measuring tape and measures the grill, then he goes over to his wife while she is bending over, measures her rear end and gasps, "Geez, it really is as wide as the grill!" She ignores this remark as well.
    Later that night while in bed, her husband starts to feel frisky. The wife calmly responds, "If you think I`m gonna fire up the grill for one little wiener, you are sadly mistaken."
  • Marriage and the Church ! Three couples, an elderly couple, a middle-aged couple and a young newly-wed couple wanted to join a church.
    The priest said, 'We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having sex for two weeks.'
    The couples agreed and came back at the end of two weeks. The pastor went to the elderly couple and asked...
  • It`s Dark in Here ! A married woman is having an affair. Whenever her lover comes over, she puts her nine-year-old son in the closet. One day the woman hears a car in the driveway and puts her lover in the closet, as well.
    Inside the closet, the little boy says...
  • Smart Dogs ! Four men were bragging about how smart their dogs are. The first man was an Engineer, the second was an Accountant, the third was a Chemist, and the fourth man was a Government Worker. To show off, the Engineer called to his dog. 'T-Square, do your stuff.'
    T-Square trotted over to a desk, took out some...
  • Nudist Colony ! A man joins a very exclusive nudist colony. On his first day there, he takes off his clothes and starts to wander the grounds. A gorgeous, petite woman walks by and the man immediately gets an erection. The woman noticeshis erection, comes over to him and...
  • Chinese Torture ! A young man is wandering, lost, in a forest when he comes upon a small house. He knocks on the door and is greeted by an old Chinese man with a long grey beard.
    'I`m lost,' said the man, 'Can you put me up for the night?'
    'Certainly,' the Chinese man said, 'but one condition. If you...
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