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For his wife, Jeeto`s birthday party, Santa ordered a special cake with this inscription:
"You are not getting older,
You are just getting better."
When asked how he wanted it arranged, Santa said, "Just put `You are not getting older` at the top, and `You are just getting better` at the bottom."
It wasn`t until Santa was ready to serve the cake that he discovered it read:
"YOU ARE NOT GETTING OLDER AT THE TOP
YOU ARE JUST GETTING BETTER AT THE BOTTOM."
- Almost married ! Santa and Banta meet after many years. Banta asks Santa, 'How have things been going?'
Santa speaking very slowly tells Banta, 'I wa.aa..sss aaal.m.ooo.sst mmm.aa.rrr. ii.e.ddd'
Banta says in amazement, 'Hey; you don`t... - Santa operated Santa wakes up following an operation to find the doctor standing at the foot of the bed.
'Doctor, how did it go?'
'I have good news and bad news', says the doctor.
'Give me the good news, I feel terrible and... -
Vet help ! Banta buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and calls a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination.
Banta doesn`t have the slightest idea what this means but not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how... - Santa in Navy Santa joins the navy and is shipped out immediately to an aircraft carrier in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. The captain is showing him around the ship, when Santa asks the captain what the sailors do to satisfy their urges when they`re at sea for so long.
'Let me show you,' says the captain and... - Check your brakes!! Santa went to his doctor and asked him how to prolong the lovemaking experience. The doctor told him that masturbating before sex often helped men last longer, extending the pleasure for them and their partner.
Santa decided, 'What the hell, I`ll try it.'
Santa spent the rest of the day thinking about where to do it. He couldn`t...