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One day on a train, there were two small boys and a middle aged lady. She sat reading her book but couldn`t help overhearing the two small boys having a deep heated discussion on the subject of spelling. "It would be spelt `W-W-W-W-O-O-O-O-M-M-M-M-B-B-B-B`," the first boy argued.
"No its not! It`s spelt `W-W-W-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-O-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-B-B-B`," retorted the other.
The lady leaned over unable to keep to herself and said, "Excuse me boys, but I think you`ll find the word is spelled `W-O-M-B`."
The first little boy looked at the other, and then back at the lady, and replied,
"You know lady, I bet you`ve never even seen a hippopotamus, let alone ever heard one fart underwater!"
- Recruiting! One day while walking down the street a highly successful HR Director was tragically hit by a bus and she died. Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself.
'Welcome to Heaven,' said St. Peter.
'Before you get settled in though, it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we`ve never once had a Human Resources Director make it this far and we`re not really sure what... -
Guard dog! Banta and his wife, Preeto, lived in a town filled with crime. After three of their neighbors` houses had been robbed, the couple decided to get a guard dog.
So Preeto went to the pet store and said, 'I need a good guard dog.'
The clerk replied, 'Sorry, we`re all sold out. All we have left is this little Scottie dog. But, he... - The Australian way A woman of 40 wants to get married, but she is only willing to marry a man if he is still a virgin. After several unsuccessful years of searching, she decides to take out a personal ad. She ends up corresponding with a man who has lived his entire life in the Australian outback.
They end up getting married. On their wedding night... - Expecting!! A young private sought permission from his Commanding Officer to leave camp the following weekend. 'You see,' he explained, 'my wife`s expecting.'
'Oh...' said the Officer, 'I understand. Go ahead and tell your wife that I wish her luck.'
The following week the same soldier was back again with the... - Religious Santa A very religious man, Santa, lived right next door to Banta, an atheist. Santa prayed day in, day out, and was constantly on his knees in communion with his Lord.
However, Banta`s life was good, he had a well-paying job and a beautiful wife, and his children were healthy and good-natured, whereas Santa`s...