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Banta and his wife, Preeto were shocked when Preeto`s doctor says she has a heart condition that could kill her at any time. She is to avoid stress, eat right, and never, ever have sex again--the strain would be too much.
So Banta and Preeto reluctantly try to live by these rules. Both get really horny over time, however, and Banta decides he`d better sleep downstairs on the couch to guard against temptation.
This works for a few weeks, until late one night when they meet each other on the stairs--Preeto is coming downstairs, and Banta is heading up.
"Honey, I have a confession to make," Preeto says, her voice quavering. "I was about to commit suicide."
"I`m glad to hear it, sweetie," Banta says, "Because I was just coming upstairs to kill you!"
- Lawyer`s statue A man was browsing in an antique store when he came upon a statue of a rat. He asked the price and the owner said, 'The statue of the rat is $100; the legend behind the statue is another $100.'
The man agreed to buy only the statue itself, although the owner warned as he left, 'You`ll be back for... - Silver jubilee Banta and Preeto decided to celebrate their 25th Wedding Anniversary with a trip to Mumbai. When they entered the hotel and registered, a sweet young woman dressed in a very short skirt became very friendly. Banta brushed her off.
Preeto objected, 'That young woman was nice, and you were so rude.'
'Preeto, she`s a prostitute.'
'I don`t believe you. That sweet... - Accident A bloke is driving around in the Australian bush and because it`s Australia his truck has got a `roo bar` on the front that protects it if he hits a kangaroo.
Suddenly he hits something, so he gets out and sees that there`s a pig wedged between his `roo bar` and his truck.
He tries to get it out but it`s stuck tight, so he gets on his... - Drunk driving Santa leaves a bar, gets into his car and drives away. A mile down the road, he`s stopped by a police officer.
The officer walked up to the driver`s side window holding a Breathalyzer and said, 'Good evening sir. We`re testing for drunk driving. Would you please blow into this machine?'
Santa replied, 'I`m sorry, I can`t... - Fastest thing Santa was one of the four persons who were in the final stages of interviewing for a prestigious job. The Company decided to fly them all in for dinner and a final interview.
Over dinner at a fine restaurant, the president of the company told them that all were very worthy applicants, and that he wished he could hire them all, but that they only had enough money budgeted to hire one person. He told them that...