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Banta and his friend are out in the country shooting rabbits. Suddenly, Banta`s friend falls right in front of him, throws a quick spasm, then lies perfectly still. He doesn`t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. In fact, he looks pretty well dead!
Quick, as a flash, horrified Banta whips out his mobile and calls for emergency. He gasps breathlessly to the operator... My friend just fell to the ground right here in front of me! He`s not breathing. He has no heartbeat! I think he is dead! What can I do?"
Well accustomed to this sort of situation, the emergency operator responds with her most soothing tone... "Okay Sir, you must try to stay calm. If there`s anything that can be done, we`ll do it. But you will have to keep your cool, then we can take it one step at a time! Okay now?
"Sure! Sure! Of course, you`re right. I`m fine. Just tell me what must I do?"
"Great! Now first of all, let`s make sure he`s dead." ....The line goes silent, then a shot is heard..... Banta`s voice comes back down the network....
`OK! What next?`
- Suicide Three high steel building workers break for lunch and sit down high above the city.
First worker opens his lunch box and complains, 'Not lentils and rice again today, Every day, lentils & rice, lentils & rice. If I have lentils & rice again tomorrow I will throw myself from this building.'
Second worker opens his lunch box and exclaims... - Roller coaster What happened?' asked the hospital visitor to the heavily bandaged man sitting up in bed.
'Well, I went to the Amusement Park at the weekend and decided to take a ride on the roller coaster. As we came up to the top of the highest loop, I noticed a little sign by the side of the track. I tried to read it but it was... -
Good deed! An air force officer goes to heaven and at the gate St Peter asks him if he has ever done anything in his life that he believes makes him worthy of admittance to heaven. The officer replies... - Lion tamer Banta: 'I`m going to become a lion tamer.'
Santa: 'That`s crazy, you don`t know nothing about no lion taming.'
Banta: 'Yes I do!'
Santa: 'Well, OK, answer me this. When one of those lions comes at you all roaring and biting, what you gonna do?'
Banta: 'I`ll take that big chair they all carry, and I`ll stick it in his face until... -
Millionaires ! After days in the wilderness Santa and Banta stumble into a bar in the wild north in J&K and ask for two beers.Unfortunately they`ve got no money and the barman won`t give them credit. Just then a Kashmiri walks in with a terrorist`s head under his arm.
The barman shakes his hand and says...