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A man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner points to three identical looking parrots on a perch and says:
"The parrot on the left costs 500 dollars".
"Why, does the parrot cost so much" asks the first man.
The owner says, "Well the parrot knows how to use a computer".
The man then asks about the next parrot to be told that this one costs 1,000 dollars because it can do everything the other parrot can do plus it knows how to use the UNIX operating system.
Naturally, the increasingly startled man asks about the third parrot to be told that it costs 2,000 dollars. Needless to say this begs the question
"What can it do?"
To which the owner replies "To be honest, I have never seen it do a thing but the other two call him boss!".
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Hurts to touch! Santa went to a doctor and said, 'Doctor, I ache all over. Everywhere I touch it hurts'
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