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    Successful Mating
    Santa and Banta are in the pub. Both are skint and in dire need of some money. All they have is one pig each, and if by luck one is male and the other female. So, after having some beers they hit on a marvelous plan to make money By mating the two pigs they will have lots of little piggies to sell.

    Next morning Santa gets up, dumps the female pig in a wheelbarrow and walks around to Banta's farm. He introduces her to the male pig and after much sniffing, serious bonking ensues.

    "How will I know she's pregnant?" enquires Santa.

    "Easily," replies Banta, "When you get up, look at the pig and if she's rolling in mud she's pregnant, if she 's eating grass she isn't so you will have to come back."

    Next morning Santa dashes to the window and the pig is happily eating grass in the field.

    "Damn," he says going downstairs and grabs the pig and puts her in the wheelbarrow. He trundles off to the other farm and more bonking ensues.

    This goes on all week with no success. One morning Santa tells the wife to look out the window and tell him what the bloody pig is doing.

    "Is she eating grass?" he asks.

    "NO," says the wife.

    "Is she rolling in the mud?"

    "No," says the wife.

    "What the hell she doing then," he cries.

    "She's in the wheelbarrow waiting for you!"
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