Jones and his wife are having hard financial times, so they decide that she'll become a hooker.
She's not quite sure what to do, so Jones says, 'Stand in front of that bar and pick up a guy. Tell him a hundred bucks. If you've got a question, I'll be parked around the corner.'
She's out there five minutes when a guy pulls up and asks, 'How much?'
She says, 'A hundred dollars'.
He says, 'Sh*t. All I've got is thirty'.
She says, 'Hold on.'
She runs back to Jones and says, 'What can he get for thirty dollars?'
Jones says, 'A hand job'.
She runs back and tells the guy all he gets for thirty dollars is a hand job.
He says, 'Okay'.
She gets in the car; he unzips his pants and out pops a simply HUGE male unit. She stares at it for a minute, and then says, 'I'll be right back.'
She runs back around the corner and says breathlessly, 'Jones, can you lend this guy seventy bucks?' |
No Sex! A boy is telling proudly to his close friend as to what he did with his girlfriend whom he took to a hotel room for three consequtive nights... 
Bonus Payments The Pentagon recently found it had too many generals and offered an early retirement bonus. They promised any general who retired straight away would get his full... 
Senior Dating Candice and Hazel , two "senior" widows, are talking. Candice, "That nice Johnson asked me out for a date. I know you went out with him last week... 
Rectal Deodorant ! A man walks into a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist for some rectal deodorant. The pharmacist explains to the man they don't sell rectal deodorant... 
Good Lover A woman decides that she's had it with trying to find a decent man in a bar. So, she takes out an ad in the paper that says she is seeking a mate who is...