| Tiger Shroff is so smooth that he should replace Katrina kaif in Veet ads... How many of you believe that Tiger Shroff is an endangered species even before his first release? Don't be mean guys... Give a big round of applause to Tiger Shroff for an outstanding Oscar winning performance in Life of Pi. Tiger Shroff's debut movie would premier on Animal Planet. Once Tiger Shroff was locked in the room by Jackie Shroff. Tiger Shroff updated his Whatsapp status as: I'm Sherlocked. Son = Jackie Shroff, Looks = Jackie Chan, Career graph like = Jackie Bhagnani. Heropanti is Jackie Shroff's attempt to be a responsible citizen by contributing to Tiger conservation project. All the movies of Tiger Shroff will carry the message 'No animals were harmed in this film'. Reporter: What's your favorite movie? Tiger Shroff : Ek Tha Tiger Why is Jackie Shroff's Son Religious? A) Because he Preys regularly. Why does Tiger Shroff look like Shekhar Suman's son rather than Jackie Shroff's. Coz they have the same shade of lipsticks. Every time I think I have seen everything, Universe shocks me with a new revelation. Just saw a Tiger Shroff Fan Club twitter handle. According to government only 1411 left in India.. but is it excluding or including tiger shroff ?? Wondering who is the prettier star kid, Alia, Sonam or Tiger Shroff? If Tiger Shroff becomes famous, his wax statue will be kept in Jim Corbett Park instead of Madam Tussaud's. Tiger Shroff is trending because Tiger is our National animal. 'Save the tigers'. Only 1411 left. Tiger Shroff: Make it 1412. 'Tiger se darr nahi lagta sahab,Tiger shroff se lagta hai.' - Indians Tiger Shroff's favorite market is Karol Bagh. Tiger Shroff will never ever beaten in any movie coz it will be against animal rights. |
| When Gandhi was studying law at the University College of London, there was a professor, whose last name was Peters, who felt animosity for Gandhi, and because Gandhi never lowered his head towards him, their "arguments" were very common. One day, Mr. Peters was having lunch at the dining room of the University and Gandhi came along with his tray and sat next to the professor. The professor, in his arrogance, said, "Mr Gandhi: you do not understand... a pig and a bird do not sit together to eat." Gandhi replies, "You do not worry professor, I'll fly away," and he went and sat at another table. Mr. Peters, green of rage, decides to take revenge on the next test, but Gandhi responds brilliantly to all questions. Then, Mr. Peters asked him the following question, "Mr Gandhi, if you are walking down the street and find a package, and within it there is a bag of wisdom and another bag with a lot of money; which one will you take?" Without hesitating, Gandhi responded, "The one with the money, of course." Mr. Peters, smiling, said, "I, in your place, would have taken the wisdom, don't you think?" "Each one take what one doesn't have", responded Gandhi indifferently. Mr. Peters, already hysteric, writes on the exam sheet the word "idiot" and gives it to Gandhi. Gandhi takes the exam sheet and sits down. A few minutes later, Gandhi goes to the professor and says, "Mr. Peters, you signed the sheet, but you did not give me the grade." |
| As Air Force One arrives at the Heathrow Airport, President Obama strides to a warm and dignified reception from the Queen. They are driven in a 1934 Bentley to the edge of central London, where they change to a magnificent 17th century carriage hitched to six white horses. They continue on towards the Buckingham Palace, waving to the thousands of cheering Britons; all is going well. Suddenly, the right rear horse lets out the most horrendous earth shattering fart ever heard in the British Empire. The smell is so atrocious that both the passengers in the carriage, must use handkerchiefs over their noses. The fart shakes the coach, but, the two dignitaries of State do their best to ignore the incident. The Queen politely turns to President Obama, "Mr President, please, accept my regrets... I am sure you understand there are some things that even a Queen cannot control." Obama, always trying to be "Presidential," responded, "Your Majesty, do not give the matter another thought... Until you mentioned it, I thought it was one of the horses." Moral of the story: Silence is Golden! |
| Once Rajnikanth taught a baby to talk...that baby was named Arnab Goswami. Arnab's wife never argues with him as she is afraid of losing. Most of the self proclaimed evidence papers he waves on his show Newshour are grocery lists written by his wife. When Arnab Goswami was in school, he used to answer every question with 33 questions. Arnab Goswami's maid once fainted due to low BP after Goswami questioned her absence from duty . Once a service manager at a prominent 5-star hotel asked Arnab for feeback on his stay. The manager was released only after Goswami asked him 74 questions. To calculate the longest Arnab Goswami has ever paused, IIT - Delhi is working on a device that can record time in nanoseconds. Proposed airport near Times Now studio cancelled as noise from The Newshour could weaken structure. Bennet & Coleman is proposing to place a mini turbine inside Arnab Goswami's throat, the resultant electricity can power all the Times group buildings in Delhi Area. Pakistan's former dictator Parvez Musharraf had 5 military interrogators question him non-stop for 34 hours in preparation for his first appearance on Newshour. If Arnab Goswami had been in Jail with Kasab... the hanging won't happen because Arnab won't let him complete his sentence!! To commemorate Arnab Goswami's 1000th "Debate", a new all-caps font is being released that seems like it is shouting at you. It will be called the TIMES NOW ROMAN. From the moon, you can see the Great Wall of China............ and you can hear Arnab Goswami shouting 'The Nation Wants to Know' !!! Arnab Goswami is fluent in English, but weak in Grammar... he has not mastered the full stop and comma! |