Marriage Adult and Non Veg Jokes

  • What is Reunion?

    Reunion is when you get up in the morning and tell your wife you are going to work.

    Instead you go to your neighbour's wife to make love to her.

    Her husband comes and knocks on the door.

    You go under the bed.

    The husband enters the bedroom.


    Feeling uneasy, the wife excuses herself to go to market to buy food items.

    The husband takes advantage of the wife's absence to call your wife.

    Your wife quickly arrives and they make love.

    Suddenly his wife who had excused herself to go to the market turned back halfway forgetting the list of food items at home and knocks on the door.

    You're still under the bed.

    Your wife rushes to hide under the bed.

    This is REUNION...
  • Advantage of Alzheimer's

    At 85 years of age, Rusi married Jeroo, a lovely 25 year old. Since her new husband is so old, Jeroo decides that after their wedding she and Rusi should have separate bedrooms, because she is concerned that her new but aged husband may overexert himself if they spend the entire night together.

    After the wedding festivities Jeroo prepares herself for bed and the expected knock" on the door. Sure enough the knock comes, the door opens and there is Rusi, her 85 year old groom, ready for action. They unite as one.

    All goes well, Rusi takes leave of his bride, and she prepares to go to sleep. After a few minutes, Jeroo hears another knock on her bedroom door, and it's Rusi, Again he is ready for more "action". Somewhat surprised, Jeroo consents for more coupling. When the newly weds are done, Rusi kisses his bride, bids her a fond good night and leaves.

    She is set to go to sleep again, but, aha you guessed it - Rusi is back again, rapping on the door, and is as fresh as a 25-year-old, ready for more "action".

    And, once more they enjoy each other.

    But as Rusi gets set to leave again, his young bride says to him, "I Am thoroughly impressed that at your age you can perform so well and so often. I have been with guys less than a third of your age who were only good once. You are truly a great lover, Rustom."

    Rustom, somewhat embarrassed, turns to Jeroo and says, "You mean I was here already?"

    The moral of the story: Don't be afraid of getting old, Alzheimer's has Its advantages.
  • A Sexual Problem

    Moanin' Mike is sitting in his local bar with his buddies, sharing a beer and bragging about his sex life.

    Moanin' says, "I have great sex with my wife. She's very vocal, she can really rattle the windows, and most of it really turns me on. I love it when she screams, 'Harder!'

    "I love it when she screams, 'Faster!'"

    "Man, you lucky dog! Says his one buddy. But come on and tell the truth, isn't there sometimes a problem with your sex life?"

    "The only problem I have..." Moanin' said dejectedly, "Is when she screams, ....'Deeper!'"
  • Use Your Wife's...

    A woman was at home when she hears someone knocking on her door. She goes to the door and opens it and sees a man standing there.

    That man asks her, "Do you have a vagina?"

    She slams the door, disgusted.

    The next morning she hears a knock at the door and it is the same man and he asks the same question, "Do you have a vagina?"
    v She slams the door in his face again.

    Later that night when her husband gets home she tells him what has happened for the last two days.

    The husband thinks for a second and tells the wife in a loving and concerned voice, "Honey, I'll take tomorrow off and stay home just in case this guy shows up again."

    The next morning they hear a knock and both run for the door. The husband says to the wife in a whisper, "Honey, I'm going to hide behind the door and listen and if it is the same guy I want you to answer yes to the question because I want to see where the bastard is going with it."

    She nods yes to her husband and opens the door. Sure enough the same fellow is standing there and asks the same question, "Do you have a vagina?"

    "Yes, actually I have one," she answers.

    So the man replies, "Good! Would you mind telling your husband to leave my wife's alone and start using yours?"
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