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Winnie The Pooh
A little girl walks in to the living room one Sunday morning while her Dad is reading the paper.
"Where does poo come from?" she asks.
The father feeling a little perturbed that his 5 year old daughter is already asking difficult questions thinks for a moment and says, "Well you know we just ate breakfast?"
"Yes," answers the girl.
"Well the food goes into our tummies and our bodies take out all the good stuff, and then whatever is left over comes out of our butts when we go to the toilet, and that is poo."
The little girl looks shocked, and stares at him in stunned silence for a few seconds before asking:
"And Tigger?" -
Dream Job Openings
Elections 2019 in simple terms:
545 openings.
No experience, no qualifications required.
No age limit.
Salary 1.9 lakhs per month even if not attending office.
Additional RS 2000 per day spent in office.
Free accommodation.
Subsidized canteen.
Free 3 telephones.
Free 25000 units electricity.
Free 4000 kilo litres water.
Free air travel 34 trips including family.
Free petrol.
Unlimited train travel in first AC.
Minimum pension Rs 20,000 for just 5 years in service.
For every additional year RS. 1500 additional pension.
Plus lots of other benefits.
Apply soon.
Selection starts 11 April, final list ready on 23 may. -
Nehle Pe Dehla
Wife Ne Husband Ko Message Kiya: Office Se Aate Hute Hue Market Se Sabzi Lete Aana. Aur Haan, Padosan Ne Tumhe Hello Kaha Hai.
Tabhi Husband Ka Reply Aata Hai: Kaun Si Padosan?
Wife: Koi Nahi, Maine Toh Sirf Isliye Message Ke Last Mein Padosan Likha Taaki Mujhe Sure Ho Sake Ki Tumne Mera Pura Message Padh Liya Hai.
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Picture Abhi Baaki Hai...
Husband Ka Message Aata Hai: Lekin Mein Abhi Padosan Ke Saath Hi Hun. Tum Kis Padosan Ki Baat Kar Rahi Thi?
Wife: Kahan Ho Tum???
Husband: Sabzi Market Ke Paas Hi Hun.
15-20 Minute Mein Sabzi Market Pahunchkar Wife Ne Husband Ko Phone Kiya: Kahan Ho Tum?? Kiske saath Ho??
Husband: Mein Toh Office Mein Hi Hun. Aur Haan, Ab Tum Sabzi Market Tak Aa Hi Gayi Ho Toh Sabzi Le Ke Hi Jaana... -
Happy March!!!
Wife: Tum Bahut Badal Gaye Ho, Aajkal Mujh Se Theek Se Baat Hi Nahi Karte?
Husband: Nahin Kaam Mein Busy Tha?
Wife: 2-3 Din Se Tum Kaam Ka Bahana Bana Rahe Ho. Tum Mujhse Kuch Chupa Rahe Ho.
Husband: Nahi Thodi Tension Hai...
Wife: Tum Hamesha Apni Tension Mujhse Chupate Ho. Mujhe Batao Hum Dono Mil Kar Koi Solution Nikalenge. Tum Mujhe Kuch Toh Batao Problem Kya Hai.
Husband: Toh Lo Suno...
Tds File Karna Hai...
Income Tax File Karna Hai...
Property Tax Dena Hai...
GST File Karna Hai...
Custom Department Main Shipment Atak Gayi Hai...
Udhari Aa Nahi Rahi Hain...
Bajar Mein Grahaki He Nahi...
Upper Se Sealing Ka Panga Pada Hua Hai...
March Closing Main Account Pe Dhyan Dun... Accountant Aa Nahi Raha Roz Goli De Raha Hai...
AB DO MUJHY ISKA SOLUTION...
Wife: Tum Naa Aaj 2 Peg Maar Hi Lo...