| A blonde woman went to see a Doctor, complaining of an upset stomach. The Doctor asked, "What did you have for dinner last night?" "Oysters," she replied. "Were the oysters fresh?" asked the doctor. "How should I know?" said the lady. "Well," asked the doctor, "couldn't you tell when you took off the shells?" "Oh my god," gasped the lady. "Are you supposed to take off the shells?" |
| A blonde went to an electronic shop in anger and threw her new laptop on the desk at a person from whom she bought. She told the salesman, "You have cheated me. I cannot transfer file from my previous laptop." Salesman: "Madam, can you please try in front of me." This is what she did: 1) Right clicked the mouse on the file which she wanted to transfer and selected CUT option. 2) Disconnected the mouse from that PC. 3) Took that mouse carefully and connected it to the other PC where she wanted to copy that file. 4) Right clicked the mouse and selected the PASTE option. Salesman fainted.... |
| A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!" |
| A blonde travels to Canada to seek her fortune as a lumberjack. She meets a foreman of a logging organization who offers to give her a job. "Now, I hope you realize we expect you to cut down at least 100 trees a day," the foreman told her. The blonde woman didn't see this as a problem, so she went out with the Chainsaw and did her best. She came back drenched in sweat. "Geez lady, how many trees did you cut down?" asked the foreman. "6" she replied. "What!? You have to do better than that. Get up earlier tomorrow!" So she did. Out she went with the chainsaw, she came back that night exhausted. "How many this time?" asked the foreman. "12," she said. The foreman says, "That does it. I'm coming out there with you tomorrow morning!" The next morning, the foreman reaches the first tree and says, "This is how to cut down trees really quickly." He pulls the rope on the chainsaw and it gives off a loud BRRRRRRUUUMMM. He notices the blonde is looking at him frantically, so he asks her what's wrong. And she replies, "What the hell is that noise?" |