| While the family was having their dinner, the little girl wasn't eating. After a few moments, she said, "I have something to tell you people." Silence around the table. "I'm no longer a virgin," and she begins to cry. A long silence again. And then, the father angrily screamed at his wife, "It's your fault! Always dress and make up like a prostitute! Do you think you are setting a good example for your daughter? The wife, in turn shouted at her husband, "What about you? Are you setting a good example? Wasting your salary on runs girls who sometimes even accompany you to your doorstep! Are you setting a good example for your daughter?" The father continued, "And her elder sister, that good for nothing, With her rasta man of a boyfriend, Who is always found with her in all the hotels. Do you believe she is setting a good example for her younger sister?" And the rant went on. The grandmother touches the shoulder of her little grand daughter to console her And asks her, "Well, my little girl, how did it happen?" And the little girl replies while still crying, "It's the priest!" The grandmother asked, "What do you mean, by 'It is the priest'?" The little girl said, "The priest has chosen another girl to be Virgin Mary in the Christmas play. I'm no longer playing the role of Virgin Mary again." Always listen to the end before you react... |
| During my School Days, I came home with my Maths Mark Sheet showing 90 marks scored by me in an exam, hoping to get compliments from my Dad. However, once my Dad took a glance of it, he said I added the 0 on the Mark Sheet to make it 90 and beat me a lot. I told him honestly that I didn't add the 0 but he wouldn't believe me. I felt so depressed that my Dad did not believe me that I did not add the 0.... and till date don't know why my Dad kept saying I added the 0. Actually I added 9. |
| Seamus is having a bit of trouble seeing things at a distance so he goes into an opticians for an eye test. The optician asks him to cover his right eye with his left hand and read the letters on the card. Now Seamus has always had difficulty telling right from left so the optician says not to worry and to cover his left eye with his left hand and then read the letters on the card but still Seamus has problems. The optician, being a helpful chap, has a brilliant idea and taking a cardboard box, cuts out two small square holes and puts it over Seamus' head with the words, "There, now cover up one of the holes and read the letters on the card through the other hole." Seamus however bursts into tears and the optician becomes very concerned, takes the box off his head and askes why he's crying. Seamus replies, "I wanted a metal frame like me brother's got." |
| In a very exclusive private school near California's Silicon Valley, a third-grade teacher was lecturing her upper-high-class students about the less fortunate. She asked them each to write an essay about a poor family in the area. One little girl's paper began, "Once upon a time there was a poor family. The father was poor. The mother was poor. The children were poor. The nannies were poor. The pool man was poor. The personal trainer was poor. The gardeners were poor... This was a very poor family!" |