| A cowboy rides up to a Saloon, goes inside and orders a drink. He`s just about got the glass of whiskey to his lips, when a guy comes running up to the door, and yells "Hey Joe! Your house is burning!" The man leaps up, runs out and jumps on his horse just as he thinks... "Hey, I don`t have a house." He goes back in and sits down, and raises the glass to his lips again. Just then a man comes running up to the door and yells "Hey Joe! Your dad has died!" So he leaps up, runs out, gets on his horse and starts to head down the street when he thinks... "Wait a minute, my dad died years ago." He goes back to the bar, and sure enough, he`s just about to take a sip of his whis- key when another guys runs up. "Joe! Con- gratulations! You`ve won the lottery! There`s a pile of money waiting for you down at the post office!" The cowboy gets up, leaps on the horse, and starts flying towards the post office. He almost gets there when he thinks, "Hey, wait a minute. My name ain`t Joe..." |
| At the time of Indo-Pak war in 1971, Pakistan Air Force had just acquired the state of the art Sabre jet from US. The jet had some outstanding technical features which were being explained by a US instructor to some trainee Paksitani pilots. The US instructor explained the aircraft`s automatic take off, automatic maneuvring, automatic supersonic acceleration, automatic weapon loading and automatic firing. Eventually, one Pakistani pilot asked, "Sir, How do we land this aircraft?" The US instructor said, "Son, Leave that to the Indian Air Force." |
| This happened to an American visitor in Madras. In his hotel room he picked up the telephone one night and asked for a 7-up. The switchboard operator answered in his best English, "7-up? Yes, sir." The cold drink never arrived, but the next morning the tourist was woken up punctually at seven o clock. |
| An insect falls into a mug of beer.... Englishman: Throws his mug away and walks out. American: Takes the insect out and drinks the beer. Chinese: Eats the insect and throws the beer away. Indian: Sells the beer to the American and insect to the Chinese and gets a new mug of beer. Pakistani: Accuses the Indian for throwing insect into his beer. Relates the issue to Kashmir. Asks the Chinese for Military aid. Takes a loan from the American to buy one more mug of beer. |