| This morning I was having bread butter in breakfast. Wanted some green chutney for extra taste. But thought of Modiji's advice and didn't ask my wife for it. I got up myself, went to the kitchen, brought it on my own from the refrigerator, applied it on bread and had it. Though the taste of chutney was different but had a great patriotic feeling of AATMNIRBHARTA. After few minutes my wife came and asked me, "Have you seen a bowl of Mehandi I kept in the refrigerator last night ?" |
| An absent-minded husband thought he had conquered his problem of trying to remember his wife's birthday and their anniversary. He opened an account with a florist, provided that florist with the dates and instructions to send flowers to his wife on these dates along with an appropriate note signed, Your loving husband. His wife was thrilled by this new display of attention and all went well until next year, on their anniversary, when he came home, kissed his wife and said off-handedly, "Nice flowers, honey. Where'd you get them?" |
| Bernie had a fight with Rachel, his wife, and went to the movies to cool off. Later that evening, he decided to phone home to see what the situation was and maybe even apologize. "Hello, darling," he said, "what are you making for dinner?" "What am I making for dinner? After all the horrible things you said to me earlier, you want to know what I am making for dinner?? Poison, that's what I'm making, poison." Bernie replies, "Okay then, just make one portion, I'm not coming home." |
| We are about to enter the summer and BBQ season. Therefore it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity, as it's the only type of cooking a "real" man will do, probably because there is an element of danger involved. When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion: Routine... 1. The woman buys the food. 2. The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert. 3. The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand. Here comes the important part: 4. THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL. More routine... 5. The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery. 6. The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with the situation. Important again: 7. THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN. More routine.... 8. The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table. 9. After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes. And most important of all: 10. Everyone praises the MAN and thanks HIM for his cooking efforts. 11. The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off." And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women. |