At this point, I would feel safer if the Coronavirus held a press conference to tell us how it's going to save us from the government! |
Once we run out of doctors and nurses they might ask vets to help out. Have you seen how they take temperatures? So stay home! |
Dear God, Give me the strength to walk away from stupid people without slapping them! |
One of the greatest luxuries in life is the ability to sleep without setting an alarm! |
I have just turned off the news and put on a serial killer documentary to relax! |
I just called the paranoia hotline. A guy answered, "How did you get this number?!" |
I wonder if spiders compare web sizes. `Wow man, you live in a mansion` Thanks dude, I built it myself! |
Dating someone is like gathering information until you realize you don't like that person anymore! |
Schools are no longer about learning, but about passing. Because we have made job requirements based on academic achievements but not actual skills! |
Why should we wear mask? Yama Dharmaraj to Chitragupta: You went to the Earth, what happened? Chitragupta: Maharaj, people are wearing masks. I couldn't recognize many of them. So, I brought only those who weren't wearing masks! |