| On the very 1st night after the wedding, the young builder to his wife, "You have cheated me. Your boobs are too small. And I definitely remember when I saw you for the first time they were pretty big". The wife curtly says, "Honey, what you saw included 'Super Area'. And what you get now is actually 'Carpet Area'!" |
| A wife comes home early and catches her hubby wanking in the kitchen. She rushes over and gives him the best blow job of his life. After the blow job, the husband asks, "We have not had sex for almost one month and suddenly this. Why?" Wife: I washed the floor in the morning; and I'd rather brush my teeth than clean the whole floor again. |
| A husband is supposed to make his wife's panties wet and not her eyes. A wife is supposed to make her husband's dick hard and not his life. |
| Two friends met after a long time. 1st: So, how's your sex life? 2nd: I don't have any. 1st: Oh My God! You got married and never told me about it. |
| Your wife is your right hand... but in the absence of your wife, your right hand becomes your wife. |
| Restaurant Advertisement: We serve food as HOT as your neighbour's wife; And beer as COLD as your own! |
| 1st night: Wife: Please, not today. Let's celebrate our honeymoon only after we understand each other. Husband: My 'under' is already 'standing' for you! |
| A lady was having tremendous pain while trying to deliver a baby. The husband prayed to God, "Oh Lord, please make the hole loose for the baby and then tight again for the Daddy". |
| Bride's dad hands a note to the groom: Goods delivered are not returnable. Groom gave another note back to the father: Contract void if the seal is broken. |
| A man was shaving his beard. His wife was shaving down under. Hubby: Appraisal meeting with the boss for promotion, have to loo good. Wife: Same here. |