| One Sunday morning an old cowboy entered a church just before services were to begin. Although the old man and his clothes were spotlessly clean, he wore jeans, a denim shirt and boots that were very worn and ragged. In his hand he carried a worn out old hat and an equally worn out Bible. The church he entered was in a very upscale part of the city. It was the largest and most beautiful church the old cowboy had ever seen. The other people in the congregation were all wearing upscale, expensive clothing. As the cowboy took a seat, the others moved away from him. No one greeted, spoke to, or welcomed him. They were appalled at his appearance and didn't attempt to hide it. As the old cowboy was leaving the church after the service the preacher went up to him and asked the cowboy to do him a favor. "Before you come back in here, have a talk with God and ask him what he thinks would be appropriate attire for worship." The old cowboy assured the preacher he would. But the next Sunday he was wearing the sameragged jeans, shirt, boots, and hat. Once again he was completely shunned and ignored. After the service the preacher again went over to the man and said, "I thought I asked you to speak to God about your attire before you came back to our church." "I did," replied the old cowboy. "And what did God tell you the proper attire would be for worshiping here?" asked the preacher. "Well, sir,` the cowboy replied, `God told me He didn't have a clue what I should wear because He'd never been in this church." |
| A man, about 80, goes to his doctor for a checkup because he is planning to get married. After congratulations and a clean bill of health, the doctor asks about his fiancee. The old man shows him a photo of a very beautiful, mid-twenties young lady. Thinking his patient might not be able to keep up with the physical stress of married life, he says, "I think you should consider getting a paying guest to keep your wife company while you have your regular naps." The patient agrees. Months later, the doctor bumps into the old man and asks, "How is married life?" The patient says, "Congratulate me, doctor. My wife is pregnant." The doctor congratulates him, and asks, "And did you take my advice about the paying guest?" "I certainly did, doctor. Thank you for that advice." "I see it worked out then," said the doctor, trying hard to hide his smile. "Oh yes, it did. She's pregnant too." |
| The flight attendant sees a suspicious looking couple on board, so she reports it to the Captain immediately. "Sir, I think we have a case of human trafficking! There is a very pretty, hot and attractive female passenger onboard, who looks quite frightened and the man she is with is a fat old slob who looks like a lecher, very sullen, mean and dangerous!" "The Captain responds, "Patricia, I've told you before... We have resigned from United Airlines and now This is Air Force One." |
| Pankaj fell in love, Pankaj married, Pankaj divorced, Pankaj Udaas. Sameera went to a parlor, Sameera did her hair, Sameera did her makeup, Sameera Reddy. Kangana hit the ball, Kangana ran for a single, Kangana did not reach the crease, Kangana Ranaut. Hrithik buys bulb, Hrithik puts bulb in socket, Hrithik switches bulb on, Hrithik Roshan. Neil arms weak, Neil joins gym, Neil does chin-ups, Neil Armstrong. Anil mombatti, Anil agarbatti, Anil dhoop, Anil Kapoor. Minisha purchased a cycle, Minisha started riding cycle, Minisha's height increased, Minisha Lamba. William making fruit shake, William took pears, William put them in glass, William Shakespeare Mika went to studio, Mika went to recording room, Mika took the mike, Mika Singh. |