| Back when Prince Andrew first became engaged to Fergie, he spoke to his father, "Fergie assures me she is a virgin. How will I know if she is?" "It's simple, son," replied Prince Phillip. "On your honeymoon night, when you get into bed, if she's clumsy, nervous, makes mistakes and is not sure what to do, then you can be fairly sure she's a virgin. But if she gives you instructions and tells you what to do, you'll know she's a lying slut who's slept around." After the honeymoon, Phillip asked, "How was it son?" "Just great, Father," said Andrew. "It was just the way you said... and no doubt about it - she's definitely a virgin." "Was she nervous, son?" asked Phillip. "She sure was Father," Andrew replied. "In fact she was so nervous and confused that when we jumped into bed, instead of putting the pillow under her head, she was in such a state she jammed it under her ass." |