Be True to Me...

  •  

    A pilot was forced to make a crash landing in a farmer's field. The farmer took the pilot back to the farmhouse, where the pilot noticed the farmer had a golden fiddle hanging above the fireplace. The two men were standing there talking when the farmer's wife came down the steps. The pilot couldn't believe how beautiful she was.

    "How can you trust her to be here by herself all day, while you go out and work the fields?"

    "I trust my wife," the farmer said. "She's never been unfaithful."

    "I'll make you a little bet. If I take your wife upstairs, she'll be unfaithful. If not, you can have my plane. But, if she is, I get your fiddle."

    "It's a deal."

    So, the pilot and the farmer's wife go upstairs. About a half hour passes, and the farmer picks up the fiddle and starts playing it... 'Be true to me, Be true to me, Be true for just one hour. Be true to me, Be true to me, And his airplane will be ours.'

    Another fifteen minutes pass, and suddenly he sees his wife coming down the stairs. He asks her if she stayed true to him.

    She walked over, picked up the fiddle, started playing it... 'He kissed me on the lips, He kissed me on the tits, He kissed me in the middle. He kissed a spot that you forgot, and you lost your fucking fiddle.'
  • Fucking Law Of... Three Fucking Laws of Management - If you learn them, no one can beat you in Corporate Management, but unfortunately even Harvard Business School does not teach them.
    1. Fucking Law of Delivery Time...
  • Horse Ride with an American Indian A woman from New York was driving through a remote part of Arizona when her car broke down. An American Indian named "Little Feather" came along on horseback and offered her a ride to a nearby town. She climbed up behind him...
  • Pissed Off ! Coming into the bar and ordering a double, the man leaned over and confided to the bartender, "I`m so pissed off !"
    "Oh yeah? What happened?" asked the bartender politely.
    "See, I met this beautiful woman who invited me back to her home. We stripped...
  • Sex Positions In the Sex Ed class the teacher says, "All right, class, I want you to go home and come back tomorrow with as many positions as you can think of for making sex."
    The next day she says to Little Johnny in the back, "Well, Johnny...
  • A Real Postive Attitude After his plane was hit and he was forced to eject, the Marine Corps fighter pilot finally regained consciousness. He was in a hospital, in agonizing pain. He found himself in the ICU with tubes in his mouth, needles and...
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT