The Arguing Rabbis

  •  

    These four rabbis had a series of theological arguments, and three were always in accord against the fourth. One day, the odd rabbi out, after the usual "3 to 1, majority rules" statement that signified that he had lost again, decided to appeal to a higher authority.

    "Oh, God!" he cried. "I know in my heart that I am right and they are wrong! Please give me a sign to prove it to them!"

    It was a beautiful, sunny day. As soon as the rabbi finished his prayer, a storm cloud moved across the sky above the four. It rumbled once and dissolved.

    "A sign from God! See, I'm right, I knew it!"

    But the other three disagreed, pointing out that storm clouds form on hot days.

    So the rabbi prayed again: "Oh, God, I need a bigger sign to show that I am right and they are wrong. So please, God, a bigger sign!"

    This time four storm clouds appeared, rushed toward each other to form one big cloud, and a bolt of lightning slammed into a tree on a nearby hill.
    "I told you I was right!" cried the rabbi, but his friends insisted that nothing had happened that could not be explained by natural causes. The rabbi was getting ready to ask for a VERY big sign, but just as he said, "Oh God...," the sky turned pitch black, the earth shook, and a deep, booming voice intoned, "HEEEEEEEE'S RIIIIIIIGHT!"

    The rabbi put his hands on his hips, turned to the other three, and said, "Well?"

    "So," shrugged one of the other rabbis, "now it's 3 to 2."
  • Laugh at Your Boss' Jokes In a unit gathering, the commanding officer cracked a joke. Everybody laughed except the young Lieutenant. Commanding officer to Lieutenant: I think you didn`t get the joke...
  • Saving a Drowning Dog This little old lady is walking her dog around the local lake. It is a cold morning and the lake is still frozen. All of a sudden her little dog spots a duck on the ice and runs out to bite the shit out of it...
  • Sports Repairman!!! Three women were sitting around and bragging about their children. The first one says, "You know, my son, he graduated first in his class from Oxford. He`s now a doctor, making $250,000 Euro a year in Chicago....
  • Elderly Road Trip While on a road trip, an elderly couple stopped at a roadside restaurant for lunch. After finishing their meal, they left the restaurant and resumed their trip. When leaving, the elderly woman unknowingly left her glasses...
  • Next Generation Kids How can a stranger tell if two people are married?
    You might have to guess, based on whether they seem to be yelling at the same kids. -- Derrick, age 8
    What do you think your mom...
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT