A guy dies and wakes up to find he is in hell. He`s really depressed as he stands in the processing line waiting to talk to an admittance counselor. He thinks to himself `I know I lead a wild life but I wasn`t that bad. I never thought it would come to this.` Looking up he sees that it is his turn to be processed into hell. With fear and a heavy heart, he walks up to the counselor.
One day Mr. Jones went to have a talk with the minister at his church.
'Reverend,' he said, 'I have a problem. My wife keeps falling asleep during your sermons. It`s very embarrassing. What should I do?'
'I have an idea,' said the minister. 'Take this pin...
A priest wanted to raise money for his church, and seeing that there was a fortune in horse racing, he decided to purchase a horse and enter it in the races. However, at the local auction, the going price for horses was so steep that the priest ended up buying a donkey. The priest figured that since he had the donkey...
Three men; a philosopher, a mathematician and an idiot, were out riding in the car when it crashed into a tree. Before anyone knows it, the three men found themselves standing before the pearly gates of Heaven, where...
Heaven is becoming too crowded so St.Peter decides that only people who had a really bad day the day they died would be allowed in. Soon after, a man comes up to the gates and St. Peter asks him to describe his day.
The man replies: 'I was certain my wife was having an affair...
Once, there was this guy, who personally felt that he has committed lots of sin and therefore decided to visit a church and confess all of his sins. When he arrived at a church, he walked to the confession area and spoke to the pastor.'Father, I have...
It so happens that the Pope and Gary Hart died at the same time. There was a mix-up, and the Pope was sent to Hell and Hart went to Heaven. Of course, Satan immediately realized the error. He was quite displeased, so he...
Twelve wives arrived at the Pearly gates.'Now,ladies,' said the officiating angel,' How many of you have been unfaithfull to your husbands?' Eleven ladies blushed and...
A man told his confessor that he d had at it with his cat, and that it was better than a woman. 'How did you do it?' 'I took him by...
There men who died the same day were presented before God. The almighty showed particular interest in their sex life. The first one replied that he never had an affair before or after he was married. God granted him...