| A superintendent of a large, apartment building got the ultimate revenge when he was called for the umpteenth time to fix a rather snooty tenant's clogged
toilet. Going to her apartment, where the female tenant happened to be giving a fancy dinner party for other tenants in the building, the super had to endure her telling all the assembled guests that he was a complete, incompetent idiot. Furthermore, she got them all to go to the bathroom door to watch his clumsiness. He didn't say anything but merely concentrated on fixing the toilet, while she kept on complaining about the bad service. So busy was she complaining, that no one noticed when the super reached quickly into his tool bag. A minute later he held something up triumphantly and told her and the assembled guests, "I've found what was clogging your toilet." All the guests broke into shocked laughter and the woman turned a bright red. The super was holding up a large yellow banana with a red condom wrapped around it. The woman never complained again. |
| The priest leaned closer to hear the girl's confession. "So me and my cousin were alone in the house," she continued, "and went up to my bedroom..." "Go on, my child," said the priest gently. "I lay down on the bed and Joe got on top of me and put his hand on my....on my..." "Go on." "On my pussy," stammered the girl, blushing behind the screen. "And touched me and touched me until I couldn't help myself." "Yes, go on," the priest directed. "I pulled down his pants and his cock popped out, stiff and tall," the girl went on, with a little whimper of shame, "and he began to shove it in me so hard..." "Yes, yes... Go on," he urged, breathing hard. "And then we heard the front door slam..." "Oh, shit!!" |
| A man took his son to the zoo. They found the monkey cage very entertaining until the father noticed two monkeys in a compromising position which embarrassed him to no end because his son was watching. He walked up to the keeper and asked if he could stop them. The keeper told him that they are in their natural habitat and could not do anything about it. The father asked the keeper, "If I throw peanuts at them, do you think they would stop?" The keeper looked at the father in the eye and said, "Would you?" |
| This guy and his girlfriend were going at it hot and heavy in the backseat of his car. A knock was heard on the window and there stood a cop. The guy got out, shaking like a leaf. The cop said that he wouldn't arrest him if he could be next. The guy got back in the car and finished with his girlfriend. When he got out again, he was still shaking like a leaf. The cop said there was no reason to be scared, because he wouldn't arrest him if he could be next. The guy said, "I'm not afraid that you'll arrest me, it's just that I've never fucked a cop before!" |