| The journey of a boy to a man in search of an answer..... When I was 13, I hoped that one day I would have a girlfriend with big tits. When I was 16 I got a girlfriend with big tits, but there was no passion, so I decided I needed a passionate girl with a zest for life. In college I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried all the time and threatened suicide. So I decided I needed a girl with stability. When I was 25 I found a very stable girl but she was boring. She was totally predictable and never got excited about anything. Life became so dull that I decided that I needed a girl with some excitement. When I was 28 I found an exciting girl, but I couldn't keep up with her. She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything. She did mad, impetuous things and made me miserable as often as happy. She was great fun initially and very energetic, but directionless. So I decided to find a girl with some real ambition. When I turned 30, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet planted firmly on the ground, so I married her. She was so ambitious that she divorced me and took everything I owned. I am older and wiser now, and I am looking for a girl with big tits. |
| Every Sunday, a little old lady placed $1,000 in the collection plate. This went on for weeks until the priest, overcome with curiosity, approached her. "Sister, I couldn't help but notice that you put $1,000 a week in the collection plate," he remarked. "Why yes," she replied, "every week my daughter sends me money, and what I don't need I give to the church." "That's wonderful, how much does she send you?" "Oh, $2,000 a week." "Your son must be very successful; what does she do for a living?" "She is a veterinarian," she answered. "That is a very honorable profession. Where does she practice?" "Well, he has one cat house in Las Vegas and another in Reno." |
| The two old coots were both only a year short of retirement from the assembly line, but one Monday morning that didn't keep Paul from boasting to Greg about his sexual endurance. "Three times," gasped Greg admiringly. "How'd you do it?" "It was easy." Paul looked down modestly. "I made love to my wife, and then I rolled over and took a ten-minute nap. When I woke up again, I made love to her again and took another ten- minute nap. And then I put it to her again. Can you believe it! I woke up this morning feeling like a bull, I'll tell you." I gotta try it, said Greg. "Keli won't believe it's happening." So that night he made love to Keli, took a ten-minute nap, made love to her again, took another nap, woke up and made love to her a third time, then rolled over and fell sound asleep. He woke up feeling like a million bucks, pulled on his clothes, and ran to the factory, where he found his boss waiting outside for him. "What's up, Boss?" he asked. His boss replied, "You are late, you're fired!" "I've been working for you for twenty years and never been late once. You aren't going to hold these twenty minutes against me now, are you?" Greg pleaded. "What twenty minutes?" growled the boss. "Where were you on Tuesday and Wednesday? |
| An Italian family is at the dinner table when the father says to his oldest son, "Chris! Why you a such a fat a boy?" Chris says, "Poppa, it's a Mama's spaghetti! I can't a stop a eating it." Poppa says, "You should a take a smaller bites!" Then Poppa says to his middle son, "Michael! Why you a such a fat a boy?" Michael says, "Poppa, it's a Mama's lasagna. I can't a stop a eating it, it's a so good." Poppa says, "You should a also take a smaller bites." Then Poppa says to his youngest son, "Fredo! How you a stay so slim a and a trim a?" Fredo says, "It's a so easy, Poppa. I eat lots and lots of a pussy." Poppa says, "Pussy? Pussy, that's a taste like shit!" Fredo says, "Poppa, You should a take a smaller licks!" |