| According to Salt Lake City police, a 27 year old woman called 911 because her husband refused to have sex with her. By the time the police arrived, the nearly nude woman had begun beating her husband, who offered as his reason for lack of desire an exciting Utah Jazz basketball game on TV. |
| A Texas-size legal battle gets under way this week when former Playboy Playmate Anna Nicole Smith goes to court seeking half of her late nonagenarian husband`s billion-dollar estate. Smith insists she did not marry the 90 year old oil tycoon for his money. But instead, he married her for her big, ripe melons. The buxom blonde bombshell says she is entitled to his money over his children because QUOTE: "They didn’t have to orally accept an ancient crusty piece of dead wood and pretend to be satisfied for 14 months!" When confronted with this fact, the adult children responded, QUOTE: "True. True." |
| Ms. Cathomas Starbird, a member of the Sausalito, Calif., school board, was sentenced to 15 days in jail for assaulting a female friend who had joined Ms. Starbird and her husband to celebrate his birthday. At the couple`s houseboat after dinner, Ms. Starbird became furious at her friend, jumped on her, and bit her on the face for refusing to perform oral sex on the husband. |
| Seattle : Puffing on a cigarette is a bit like inhaling from the back end of a cow, or being poisoned like a rat, according to a new ad campaign sponsored by Washington state health removed. Douglas aknowledged being a member of the players that had used the caddy, but denied being the person who struck the ball. He allegedly hit the golf ball before Parker had reached a safe distance on the green, and did not yell "Fore" when he hit the ball. |