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Wrong Password
A new blonde employee calls the Help Desk to complain that there's something wrong with her password. No, it's not the usual caps-lock problem.
"The problem is that whenever I type the password, it just shows stars," she says.
"Those asterisks are to protect you," the Help Desk technician explains, "so if someone were standing behind you, they wouldn't be able to read your password."
"Yeah," she says, "but they show up even when there is no one standing behind me." -
Blonde Crew
A phone company put an ad in the paper in order to recruit workers. The next day, two groups of workers show up - a crew of five men and a crew of five blonde women.
The company cannot decide who to give the job to, so they give the two groups a test. The company boss says, "Each crew will receive a telephone pole that must be installed into the ground. Whoever is able to hammer it in first will get the job."
Both groups agree that this is a fair test, so off they go in the Company trucks with the long telephone poles sticking out the back. A few hours pass, and finally, at 5:00, the male crew returns.
"Yes!" they shout. "We came back first, so we get the job!!"
"Good work, men," says the boss, "However, we must wait until the other crew comes back to make sure that the reason they're delayed is not because of traffic or the truck breaking down."
"Fine, no problem," say the men.
An hour passes, two hours pass, three hours. Finally, at 8:30, the Blonde crew arrives. All the group is flushed and breathing hard, as if they had just gone through harsh labor.
"What happened to you? What took so long?" asks the boss incredulously.
"What do you mean, 'what took so long'?? Do we get the job?"
"YOU get the job? No way! The men were back here HOURS ago!"
"Well, of course they were," say the blondes. "They only put the pole in halfway!!" -
Oil Cap
A blonde goes to a auto parts store and asks for a Seven Ten cap.
Everybody look at each other and ask, "What's a seven ten cap?"
She says..., "You know, it's right on the engine. Mine got lost somehow and I need a new one."
"What kind of a car is it?" they ask.
She says that it's a Buick.
"Okay, Lady, how big is it?"
She makes a circle with her hands about 3 1/2 inches in diameter.
"What does it do?"
She says, "I don't know, but it's always been there."
One of the guy gives her a note pad and asks her if she can draw a picture of it. So she makes a circle about 3 1/2 inches in diameter and in the center she writes 710.
The guys on the opposite side of the counter are looking at as she writes it...and they just fall down behind the counter laughing so hard.
One guy says, "I think you want an OIL cap." -
New Compaq
A blonde was in jail serving 30 years for robbing banks. After serving about 12, he's notified that his uncle has died and left him over $100,000.
The blonde was so happy when the warden gave him the news, that he made a promise to put the money in a trust fund until he was released. The warden asked him if there was anything he wanted to buy before tying up the money.
The blonde said he had read a lot about computers and wanted a PC. The warden agreed and got him a computer - a brand new Compaq. After a few weeks, the warden visited him in his cell to see how he was doing. To his amazement, he saw the computer smashed on the floor.
The warden asked him what happened and the the blonde said it didn't work properly and that it would not even complete the simplest of tasks.
The warden asked him what he wanted the computer to do, and the blonde said he just wanted one simple task, but the computer couldn't perform it.
The blonde said, "I hit the Escape key and nothing happened, I hit the key again and still nothing, I am still here. I think I'm going to sue Compaq."