| John gets a call from his blonde girlfriend, Buffy. "I`ve got a problem," says Buffy. "What`s the matter?" asks John. "Well, I`ve bought this jigsaw puzzle, but it`s too hard. None of the pieces fit together and I can`t find any edges." "What`s the picture of?" asks John. "It`s of a big Rooster," replies Buffy. "All right," says John, "I`ll come over and have a look." So he goes over to Buffy`s house and Buffy greets him saying, "Thanks for coming over." Buffy leads John into her kitchen and shows him the jigsaw on the kitchen able. John looks at the jigsaw and then turns to Buffy and says, "For Pete`s sake - put the Cornflakes back in the Box." |
| Once a Blonde was traveling on a train. He felt sleepy so he gave the guy sitting opposite him on the train 20 rupees to wake him up when the station arrived. This guy was a barber, and he felt that for 20 rupees, the Blonde deserved more service. So, when the Blonde fell asleep, the barber quietly shaved off his beard. When the station arrived, the Blonde was woken up, and he went home. Reaching home, he went to wash his face, and suddenly screamed when he saw the mirror. "What is the matter?" Says his wife. He replied, "The cheat on the train has taken my 20 rupees and woken up someone else." |
| Jill and Pam applied for a single position at a company, and
both were given a written exam to determine their qualifications. When the exams were scored, it was found that both applicants missed only one question. The hiring manager told Jill, "Thank you, but I`ve decided to go with the other candidate." "What?" cried Jill. "You said we both got nine out of ten questions correct! It`s because I`m a blonde, isn`t it? This is discrimination! You people are going to have a lawsuit on your hands!" "Not at all," the manager said calmly. "I based my decision on the nature of each incorrect response." "And how can one wrong answer be any worse than another?," the indignant Jill demanded. "Simple," said the manager. "Pam answered question five with, `I don`t know.` You put down `Neither do I.`" |
| A blonde went to a Flying School, insisting she wanted to learn to fly
that day. As all the planes were currently in use, the owner agreed to
instruct her on how to pilot a helicopter solo by radio. He took her out, showed her how to start it and gave her the basics and sent her on her way. After she climbed 1,000 feet, she radioed in, "I`m doing great! I love it! The view is so beautiful, and I`m starting to get the hang of this." After 2,000 feet, she radioed again, saying how easy it was becoming to fly. The instructor watched her climb over 3,000 feet, and was beginning to worry when she hadn`t radioed in. A few minutes later, he watched in horror as she crashed about half a mile away. He drove over and pulled her from the wreckage. When he asked what happened, she said, "I don`t know! Everything was going fine, but as I got higher, I was starting to get cold. I can`t remember anything after I turned off the big fan." |